New Yorker Rejects #2

A very Merry Yuletide Season to you. I've been celebrating Yuletide for years now. It's when the Yule goes out, twice a day, and little elves scurry along the shore probing for sweets with their proboscii. Nobody else seems to know about it. Or I have it wrong. It might actually be a proto-Germanic festival involving a goat and something called Julebukking.

In any case, here are the cartoons I submitted to The New Yorker last month:

Yeah, it happens. Surgical anxiety, not balloon animal patients.

This is how you get a hot meal at penguin school.

I can't wait for my robo-nanny!

Deer do get COVID, and would be wise to just avoid people for all sorts of reason. They're pretty stupid though, so they don't.

We are so species-ist. It's not disgusting to secrete a thick layer of mucous from the entire surface of your skin. At least no grosser than mayonnaise cakes.

Some of us are stuck in the past...

Some of us are stuck in the present...

Some of us aren't excited about the future...

Which is why dogs are such great role models. They live in the moment. They're not planners. Except border collies. Those -—ers are smart.